I’m not a mall ninja. I could never be a mall ninja. I would never want to be a mall ninja. Then there’s this. It’s cartoonishly huge. It’s ridiculously over the top. I can’t carry it around, and I don’t want to be seen with it. There’s no knife policy where I work, but there bloody well would be if I took THIS! It’s one of the Sitivien Chinese Zodiac Series knives…in this case Sheep. They’re all big, chonky fun and they make me smile so I’m working toward all twelve. This is my seventh. A collection is a collection, I suppose. For what it’s worth, it’s actually mighty sharp and has great action if you have the finger strength to move the 1960 Cadillac of a blade. Now I just need a job as Assistant Night Manager at a convenience store so I could carry this and tell everyone, “I wish a motherfucker would.”
by Various-Catch-113
